Surgery Blues

I'm currently I preparing for the surgery on my right leg that is scheduled for next week, I find myself feeling really anxious. This will be the first time under the knife in my adult life and there are many questions that need answers.

One major question is will the hospital let my Mom stay in the hospital room with me. I'm getting this surgery in another state and my Mom won't be able to travel back and forth cause she doesn't drive. When I was a kid they always let her stay with me or provided accommodations for her to stay near the hospital, but I was a minor then and she had a lot more ammunition to fight them if they asked her to leave. Now I'm an adult and though I shutter at the idea at being in a Hospital in a whole other state without my Mom there for me, I'm trying to prepare myself for the possibility that they could just say no. Which would mean she would have to go home and only return when I'll be coming home.

As if worrying about that isn't enough I'm also freaking out about the actual surgery itself. I've never taken being put under anesthetics very well and ALWAYS woke up extremely sick and having breathing trouble. A couple of my surgery's I've even spent a week after the surgery in the ICU. My body just doesn't handle that kind of stress very well and I just keep hoping that with age and getting physically stronger I may have become strong enough to handle this surgery better than all the others.

Right now I can't do anything about either of these questions so I'm just gonna focus on packing and making sure everything is taken care of before I leave.